I'm back..

should I just keep my mouth shut ?

Yea..perhaps I should just shut my mouth up

and only then conflict could happen lesser..and

I won't be saying anything that could hurt someone else...

things I've been tolerating...I used to think they are things..I need and should to tolerate with?

but..one day, I realize...it seems like ..none of my efforts were ever appreciated or even noticed...

that...really cold my heart down

as in...thing are all cleared ..(?)

path that used to be covered with mist..

is now..all clear in front of you...waiting for you to accept the truth,

disappointment?

...I don't know it already

or is it anger?

what i know is that...I'm surprisingly calm with it..(?)

tired..perhaps (?)

never has I told you how much I've gone through..

or maybe...even if I really gonna tell you, you'll never understand it or might just take it easy ?

trust me..I tried to let you know

I did gave in effort to build a better relationship..

maybe my sight were blurred ?

or maybe this is your true form?

... I feel tiring to guess over it now..does it matter even thought I get the answer?

the truth is...I'm still disappointed for lots of time..

you fail me every time I gave you a chance ?

you make me realize how foolish I am to expect things could change better ?

.. when all of those hope crumbles.. what's left with me..

only...sigh

"see I told you, it won't works.."

and still.. you came by, with only making simple statement..

enough to make me fell bad

even felt guilty..

began to wonder....if all these things happened

all 

because of me

myself

?

I am the one who hurt my own self..

?

as long as I keep smiling, no one knows

they might someday thought I'll never feel tired..

or maybe thinking that I'm something like...terminator, so tahan lasak

what's the point telling all these to you ?

will things change?

sometimes I wonder...“你是否会发觉 我已经说再见” ？

... my thoughts of you did changed or ...

I'm shocked by what she told me...

the you I never knew..

I wonder about it..recalling what she told me while looking at the side profile of you..

I thought...you really did think that way?

and I'm here thought that I'm close with you that I know what you're thinking..

yet...I never knew it...and by now, I don't know how or what..

I'm confused...

what I saw you did with what the thought of your told from her...

they're just...too contrast for me 

..by the meantime, I shall..

.. stay away? from you...maybe this could make us think better??

I don't know..

It's just kinda hard when I need to face you now..

dear mouth, will you just keep shut for these few days?

don't feel bad when the atmosphere is cold

don't feel that it's your responsibility to speak something your brain not prepared to when the atmosphere is bored..

don't say stupid and hurtful words you think could make people laugh and kill the boredom

..just..try to used to quietness ..just for a bit

I'm very much thankful for it..

fighting

it's been awhile..

I've been away from my blog for days..

last saturday, I went to my cousin's house and stayed for a night..

as usual..chit chat non stop...

chat about..life, ghost stories, science, and..pretty girls

..seems like everything is fine..

somehow...it might not as what it seems to be

 anyway, I then spent my time playing with the youngest cousin..

she's cute and I'm glad she likes to play with me..

I too found out that she likes tie hair

and so...I allowed her to tie my hair when she ask for permission

cute, isn't she?

it's hard to get her pic..

I only managed to snaps her side profile after I let her tie my hair..

.."children in paradise"

Elaine, do enjoy your childhood..

it's a period which people always wanted to go back to

as for today, I bought..candies again   

i.. shouldn't be so 花 ..

already have chocolate..and now, I still wanna have candies somemore..

after trying the yellow packet with cute cartoons...

I have a feeling that the other pink packet with cartoons too won't taste nice..

however, the others are jjang ~

so..do the calculation...+ - x ÷ 

=  worth #

 to everyone ..especially those who are facing problems..

do understand the meaning of this phrase and..apply to ur life

面对它，接受它，处理它，放下它

晚安 ～

fin.

..sick lately..

above are the medicines I've been taking..

..consult doctor for 2 times..and that's why I'm getting these lots of medicines..

病魔 离我远远

 hyung, thanks for being my private doctor these days

I wonder..if I can meet you at friday

but..friday I have class  oh nuuuuuuuuuu...

however, I'll just pray the lecturer will go out from the class

earlier from what he normally did..then..deal

sure can meet you already

can't wait can't wait..

and , tension's song, 我们的故事..

brings back a lot of memories..feel nostalgic...

remember the two of us change the lyrics into

“不要放弃 因为有一天‘元畅’会继续”

童年 真好

人，事，勿 。。都会变

。。多舍不得也好 也阻止不了。。

回忆 会被遗忘。。但不会变吧（？）

如果 把回忆都删除掉

就不会知道 “变化”

看则事情在转变

却什么也做不了

无奈

又下雨了。。

今晚会很好睡吧

对了 Vanessa , 生日快乐 ～

心想事成

晚安 是时候睡了

fin.

ever wonder..how your dream room / house gotta be ?

recently, we have an assignment

which is to design our own dream room..

..some want it to be big

..some want it have a modern looks

...and hyung, want it to be hotel-like feel

mine..I just want it to be moderate big ,

have a balcony in it ,

a at least queen size bed that is plain in colour..white the best,

a fluffy carpet placed somewhere near the bed,

with a table placed near a window,

the lighting used are all dimmed light..

and the style of my room gonna be simple , natural and...laid-back style (?)

what matters the most for me..

should be..who will be living in that house..i suppose

sorry for the cheesy line...

I lived in a tiny little house before...

and I did lived in a quite big house before...

I found it...eventhough the house is very tiny,

yet..the memories I had during that time consider the most happiest..

tiny , simple , messy , clear , ..everything is not complicated...

those days are too happy if were to compare to nowadays..

anyway, people always felt the happiest when around with someone they like...

and everyday, people works hard to fulfill their dreams and

their ideal life including their ideal room or house..

You and I are one of them too

let's work hard together to achive something what we call happiness..

一起加油吧..

fin.